life coach
To be coached or not to be coached…
Today, after sharing a recent experience, a friend said the most beautiful words to me EVER: “Kristina, you’ve changed!” It was said with so much love and I welcomed the compliment gratefully and without an “awe shucks but…”
No buts about it, I have changed and I am so proud of it too! Life happens, it moulds us, gives us knocks, hardships, joy, love, life lessons, and hopefully, with all of that, we change – for the better once we decide to get ourselves back up!
The past few years, I’ve referred to myself as Kristina 2.0 – I know I’m new & improved (although it’s been discussed I was already pretty darn good). I feel it, I hear it and I see it – most times I can stand triumphantly in my change. I’m not gonna lie though, it’s not always easy!
I’m a constant work in progress – we all are. I’ve been asked the who, what, when and more about some of my life changes. I hate to break it to you, there is no magic pill to swallow, no one could do it for me, I had to be willing to change – I had to take the leap of faith…
As I’ve written about in past blogs, my change began with a friend introducing me to GROOVE – I will be forever grateful for that!! From there, I discovered yoga, meditation and became more open to things I wanted to change about myself. Most of my friends know that when I wholeheartedly love something, I scream about it from the rooftops! I want everyone to drink from the water fountain and experience these life changing opportunities too.
I’d like to share my new passion and while I’ve mentioned before as well, I want to focus on it a bit. Several months ago, while in the depths of grief, life changes in work and personal life, I agreed to start working with a Life Coach. I knew I needed direction, focus and accountability. Wow, am I ever glad I chose to invest in myself like this. She is amazing and I’m not just saying it because she’s also a dear friend, I’m saying it because it’s true! I’m saying it wholeheartedly that this is something worth looking into when you are open and willing to delve into your layers and discover your true self.
Now, it’s not always easy and I don’t want to scare ya, however, sometimes, the work is hard, overwhelming and challenging – I may or may not have delivered a few F-Bombs her way as we do the work! Yet, you want to go back for more – yeah, she’s THAT good! AND IT”S WORTH THE WORK!!!! Without going into the details of coaching and what she does (I encourage you to check out her website here and see if it’s something that would benefit you) it’s been layer after layer of unbelievable, mind blowing discovery of how I got to this point, what drives the decisions I’ve made & will make, what I can do to shine, see my path clearly, be more confident, believe, trust and so much more! She has provided me with the space to change, acknowlege my changes and she’s a dam good cheerleader for your success – so I can even welcome the words, “you’ve changed” cause yeah, baby I sure have and I’m better for it! #coachingsuccess #mysuccess
I wish you endless success, welcome change, love, inspirations and giving yourself a chance to discover YOUR 2.0!
Giving Permission to get Angry!
“When angry, count to four. When very angry, swear.”
― Mark Twain
Life isn’t always pretty. It’s isn’t at all like all the Facebook & Instagram pictures or quotes either! Life is messy and that’s okay! It’s just how we deal with the mess that makes the difference right?!
Last week, I was angry, I mean REALLY angry. I was angry with everything from dealing with my crazy neighbour to business stuff, personal stuff and more. I’m sure if hubby looked at me the wrong way, I would have bitten his head off & spit out his eyeballs – yup that angry. To top it off, I got angry with myself for being so angry. I was just at the yoga conference, I shared love & time with friends, I got inspired, enlightened – so what gives?!!!! I mean, seriously, what was SOOO horrible that I was this p.o.’d? Yes, I was a little impatient with some business stuff, yes, I was a little stressed with the dog being ill and yes, I was annoyed because things weren’t going the way I thought they should or things weren’t moving along as fast as I wanted. It was a day of feeling like the Universe was using me as target practice and having a really good belly laugh each time I got hit!
It was ugly, and honestly, exhausting. I had a to do list a mile long, I was scheduled to work with my coach and all I wanted to do was drive off, run away and disappear. No one would miss me right?! I did laugh when I saw the ferry sign (en route to pick up meds for the dog at the vet) saying it was only 21% full. I thought, hey, I’ll just drive on, then I looked at the gas gauge on the van & figured with only ½ a tank, I’d get as far as Chilliwack and that didn’t seem far enough!
When I was younger (I mean like 20 + years ago younger), I’d get angry, something would trigger me & I’d explode. True to my Leo nature, I’d roar then chill then try and talk it out. Sometimes I’d let it fester & create a really good story. Mom would always say to me that I needed to learn to “reign it in & control that anger”. Whenever I’d get angry, I was told to “get it under control.” I do hold it in…. then, when triggered, it explodes into shear ugly! So, why hold it in? Why not take time to express anger (hopefully without throwing up on someone)! Why not honour that feeling too?! Well, because until recently I was always told not to – that’s why!
AND, back to last week… I felt like this
It was coaching day. Now, over the past several months, one of the, let’s say, “challenges” is to give myself permission to express anger. What a concept! I still struggle with this – so much so, that I try to add it to part of my self care. Giving myself permission to yell into a pillow, throw rocks at the beach that kinda stuff. To be honest, I find it hard to express anger when I’m not triggered – when that happens stay away! I admit, I’m not the best version of myself!
So, as I sat with my coach, I began to express how angry I was (I may even sassily told her #coach that!) that day. We agreed I was not coachable at that moment. Without going into more details – you’ll need to connect here with who I believe is #supercoach. I did come to a few realizations…
I needed to sit with this anger. I needed to allow it to just be part of me. I HAD to give myself permission to be angry AND better yet, that it was totally & completely A-OK! I tuned out completely, cuddled on the couch with the dog and watched a movie. I turned my brain to off and I didn’t even feel guilty about it!!
I had to facilitate a GROOVE class that night, so I had to get my act together! Nice thing is when the music started, class started and the anger began melted away… until now, only one person really knew what that day was like for me. I came home exhausted, had cake & tea to finish off the night.
Honestly, anger is tiring for sure, however, it’s human and it’s totally okay to be human. It’s okay to let anger be part of life’s messiness. Give yourself permission to express anger and let that shit go….it feels WAY better! I’m not saying this won’t happen again & I’ve reached some enlightened state, it just feels like I shed a good layer, that’s all.
Until next time, may you find love, peace, give yourself permission to express anger, a way out of the messiness, and of course, may you find an opportunity to discover YOUR 2.0!
Courage, Coaching & Comfort Zones…
Recently, a friend complemented my courage. I smiled & shrugged it off as nothing. That word has been sitting with me and well, I guess I have my next blog…
When I reflect on the word courage, the first thing that comes to my mind is the lion from The Wizard of Oz. He thought he had no courage and took a very courageous journey down the yellow brick road to ask the wizard for some. Well, I don’t have a yellow brick road to follow however, the journey is no less a task.
Courage, for me, is associated with those who fight for our freedoms; willingly sacrifice their lives so I can live in this amazing county. It’s for those who stand in defiance for causes they believe in. It’s not for little ‘ole me…. or is it?
The definition of courage is “the ability to do something that frightens one,” OR “strength in the face of pain or grief.” So, by this definition, I have to accept my friend’s complement. Now, that’s THE challenge!
A little more than a month ago I started working with a Life Coach. She’s also a friend, she’s amazing and well, to be honest, she’s been pushing me out of my comfort zone for the past 6 years! I keep going back for more lol! During one of our coaching sessions, we spoke about how I felt around this word courage. After my self-defense mechanisms (that’s another blog) were put to rest, I’ve become more open to this word. What if it really could be used to describe me, after all, 2016 has thrown me a slew of hurdles, challenges and pain both personally and professionally. Thanks to a little push, perhaps, just perhaps, I can accept that I have courage. If I follow the definition, then it’s a very applicable word!
~Maybe it takes courage to keep going in my professional life even after it feels I’ve been knocked down a 100 times – I got up 101 times and kept moving forward.
~Maybe it takes courage to walk with grief, sadness & anger with the passing of a loved one.
~Maybe it takes courage to step outta my comfort zone and embrace the changes surrounding me.
~Maybe it takes courage to accept change, be ready for change and most importantly, be willing to change.
~ Maybe it takes courage to put one foot in front of the other when you feel you just can’t walk anymore.
~Maybe it takes courage to let your tribe support you when you need them most.
~Maybe it takes courage to ask for help.
~Maybe it takes courage to share this.
There’s no maybe about it, yes it takes SO much courage and courage is just what I realize I’ve got!
I wish you the confidence to stand strong in your courage, to be strong, to trust you’ve got this, to love wholeheartedly and of course an amazing opportunity to discover YOUR 2.o!
Discovering YOUR 2.0 